Death Denial

Why is it that when the topic of death arises in conversations people tend to dismiss it as an inappropriate subject for discussion? Many times the topic of death is viewed as "morbid." Goths are stereotyped as "weird," "dark," or "messed up" because they commonly talk about death. Why do we call those who enjoy discussing death "weird?"

Maybe it's because we only think about death when American society has deemed it appropriate to - e.g. Funerals, Legal Wills, or War. See, there's a big difference between saying, "Yeah, I will die some day" and embracing death. Embracing death would mean something completely different from merely giving the topic attention at funerals, for legal wills, or during war (for example). How often do we RSVP to a party invitation with this response: "I plan to attend your party for certain, with the exception that I am run over by a car while crossing the street to your house; then in that case I will not be attending."

If death is certain and for the most part seems spontaneous, then what good is it to think about it day to day? First, I think its likely someone who doesn't think about death a great deal of time has not really accepted it. If we truly accepted death, how could we not factor it into the reality of our everyday life? Isn't it true that at any point we could die? Everyday, there is a chance that we could keep living or die. To not accept this as a reality is death denial.

Death denial is facetious because it does little to alter the reality of our situation. It is merely a way to "cope" with what is real, and to substitute a false approach to the world in which we live for a real one in order to "cope" with our fears is probably harmful to our individual self-fulfillment. I think this is true for two reasons: 1) When we see others die, especially those that we love, our death denial collides with reality. This leads to serious emotional and psychological problems, and as we grasp to fill the void death denial once did, we reach for other even more absurd things (the examples I will leave to you). 2) Individually, to live as if we might die abruptly brings a whole new perspective to human existence - one that motivates us to ambitiously explore and embrace life for everything that pleases us.

I think it's obvious that many people, especially in modern, industrial and advanced societies, have death denial. If Johnny, a computer tech service guy from some complicated company name who is indifferent towards his job, thought he was going to die in 8 hours, would he go into work to embrace his life one last time or would he spend that last 8 hours enjoying life in whatever ways please him?! Of course, we can't know exactly when we are going to die like Johnny did, but that's the point: we don't know if we are going to stay living either. And that makes all the difference! Think about it. If we truly embraced our imminent and spontaneous deaths, what would we spend our time and effort on?